Monday, September 23, 2013

BLOG TOUR: Marriage 101 for Men by Sherri Mills

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ABOUT THE BOOK

Get out of the doghouse and back into the bedroom simply by swapping the TV remote for the toilet brush! Whether you’ve been married for three months or thirty years, failing to help around the house remains a major cause of discord. Following this book’s principles, a husband learns to decrease disputes and increase intimacy by:
  • owning his share of household work
  • listening to his wife’s needs and communicating his own
  • spending the time on chores now to make more time for love later.
Using Marriage 101 for Men as a guide, you’ll be able to understand, alleviate, and ultimately eliminate the symptoms of stress in your relationship and be happier and more satisfied with all aspects of your marriage.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Sherri Mills has been a hairdresser for over 45 years. She has had her own salon long enough to see life happen before her very eyes. She has listened to real-life problems and followed real-life outcomes—-successes and failures—and through several generations, longer and more extensively than marriage counselors can.

In her practice she has seen the pain from too many divorces that didn’t have to happen. She has been obsessed with trying to save as many marriages as she can.

Sherri’s first book, I Almost Divorced my Husband but I Went on Strike Instead, was written to women, with detailed instructions on how to deal with the double-duty double standard of householder work and how to have more appreciation for their own husbands.

Men wanted instructions of their own, so Sherri outlined in this book real solutions to issues that sabotage marital accord. The book is written in such a manner as to make sense to the male partner in the marriage.

REVIEW

I am not the designated demographic for this book. I am not male and I am not married.  However, as a woman, I can definitely appreciate the things that Mills has to say about women and their needs. As a hairdresser, Mills has spent decades listening to men and women talk about their marriages and one of the things that she has observed is that many marriages fail because of the uneven distribution of household responsibilities.  This also was the case in her own marriage.  She briefly describes what she did to address the problem (going on strike--which is discussed more thoroughly in her first book, I Almost Divorced my Husband but I Went on Strike Instead) and the incredible difference that her husband's involvement in household duties made in their marriage.

The book goes on to discuss specific examples of people whose marriages broke up because of the anger and resentment created by the wife's trying to 'do it all' by herself.  Lack of communication and understanding seems to be at the heart of most of the problems mentioned.  The author explains that many women aren't interested in intimacy because they are simply overwhelmed and exhausted from trying to manage the household by themselves.  She points out that when husbands step up and take on some of the responsibilities the results can be wonderful for both spouses.  With lots of specific tips and brief explanations the book can be read quickly. Also the appendixes provide additional helps including: a message to women who don't want to give up control but want their husbands to contribute, a fair marriage contract like the one she used with her own husband, and a list of household chores that can be used to come to an agreement.  A wonderful resource for both married and single men and women who want to make their relationships the best they can be.

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